A core concept that underlies the attachment experience is the idea that our actions and behaviour mean something, although the meaning behind the behaviour and the actual attachment needs might not be apparent.
And it’s important to note, the same behaviour can mean different things at different times.
When we reflect on our own behaviour and emotional undertone we take a step towards understanding our children’s needs, no matter the behaviour they present in the moment.
It isn’t necessary to have precise knowledge of the meaning behind an action or behaviour. Instead, we can focus on what the behaviour feels like, sit in it with our children, and feel it with them. This is what attachment teaches us.
The take-away is our shared experience.